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December 21, 2005

merry christmas and salaam alehkum

not so much happening in the philippines for christmas except a lot of shorts-n-tshirt weather carolling as well as daily church-going. hahahah!


seriously though folks, nothing says happy holidays than a heavily edited He-Man video... or perhaps a punch in the face by a drunken parental unit. that's what christmas is all about.

click here for video

courtesy of the Turd

November 10, 2005

it's been a rough life

you may think it's all fun and games being thejerk but i wasn't always this handsome possessing a perm to die for. i've recently dug up a few photos from my past. they bring bring back bittersweet memories of a time when i was more innocent and less diseased.

Continue reading "it's been a rough life" »

July 30, 2005

ronald mcdonaldland

if you're like me, you've fantisized about at least one member of the cast of mcdonald's. no, not the pasty overweight deep fry technician at your local mcdonald's. i'm talking about Grimace, the Hamburglar, or even fear-inducing (yet strangely arousing) patron clown, Ronald.

Continue reading "ronald mcdonaldland" »

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July 24, 2005

i stand by my choice (weakly)

some of you with softer musical taste may enjoy this filipino song. those of you that listen to screaming and yelling under the guise of "music", don't bother clicking on the link. that means you harish, chunky sack, and syrian nightmare. actually, maybe it's better you guys just die. why won't you just die!

Continue reading "i stand by my choice (weakly)" »

July 19, 2005

i'm fat but she's...

as i was trawling the web for east german scheize porn kazaaing mp3's on my free wifi connection, i found this picture of teen angst vanilla pop-star, michelle branch. the obvious question is: how is it that michelle branch has a worse body than me!?

Continue reading "i'm fat but she's..." »

July 15, 2005

tree hugging euro-trash

i'm not sure what these guys are protesting but knowing europeans as well as i do, (after all, i earned an associates degree in political science at tompkins county community college minoring in sweatshirt design) i'd wager a steak dinner it's something that involves unrealistic environmental protection at the expense of consistent economic growth. you hippy euro-trash can protest what you want but when you treat bike seats like that, you obscure your mission by the atrocities committed to your poor bicycle seats.

Continue reading "tree hugging euro-trash" »

June 04, 2005

i'm such a screwup

i think britney spears said it best in her song, "gee whiz, i've done it again now."

in my idiotic attempt to fix's pulldown menus for opera compatibility, i've screwed up the site for internet explorer. i'm a talentless hack and i deserve this punishment and more. the timing is beyond perfect because tomorrow, i leave bangkok and with it, free internet and the possibility of fixing the site or at least hacking something else together. i guess my audience (both of you) will have to live with a janky site for a while. what it boils down to is, i've alienated 70% of the market (IE users) for 15% (opera users). do the trigonometry and you'll conclude beyond a reasonable doubt i have extra chromosomes.


on a lighter note, i'm still sick and eating little to nothing. but now i no longer sweat when i lie down or for that matter, sweat when i eat (exclusively because i no longer eat, i'm not cured or anything). a change of scenery and perhaps a few remotely detonated bombs in southern thailand will wake me up as i run in a zig-zag fashion in between rebel fire.

June 03, 2005

useless food for your rotten thoughts

is it me or are tim meadows and don cheadle the same guy?

(you try to tell them apart)

how dare you!? no, you're racist! no, you are! i only see the colors of a person's personality and the odd angles of misshapen penises!

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April 07, 2005


i just popped a really painful zit on my nose.

January 31, 2005

no need to lose any sleep worrying

look, i thought you may be concerned so i'll address the issue here and now:

there's no need to worry... i'm staying over-hydrated with a conscientious daily regiment of diet coke - thank vishnu for its abundant availability. really, at the heart of my overstay in phnom penh, is the fact that diet coke is so readily available whereas for my next destination, i can't make that statement with confidence.

so rest assured, i'm maintaining a daily quota of at minimum, 12 cans of diet coke (which here is called coke light).

January 26, 2005

cursed tekmology!

i'm not sure if this blog notification thing is working so if you've signed up, bear with me. next time i have unlimited internet, i'll give it a good "rogering."

January 02, 2005

happy 2005

as of last night, the clock is reset!

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