i realize i'm way behind in sending out pictures. Indonesia's one of those rare countries that has a mind-boggling lack of internet and internet related accessories. furthermore, the few connections that exist are slow and unreliable for sending large image files without interruption.

now that i've shifted the blame for my delay to Indonesia's infrastructure, here are the highlights:

- the fierce dragons of Komodo and their claws, razor-sharp teeth and much like my baby sister, a lack of discernible gentialia
- Kelimutu, otherwise known as the tri-colored lakes or 3-colored lakes, if i may
- the boredom that comes with 4 years of traveling and 112 degree heat that imprisons you indoors (no photos available)

fotos Indonesia!

if you've bothered to read this far, you'll see it's a two-for Tuesday special! the second installment of Indonesia is a bit short on my set target number of pictures. i lost the will to live for a few months back there so the camera's shutter moved as little as my shapeless, overweight body. the trend continued in East Timor as you'll see in these fantastically uninspired pictures:

fotografias East Timor

i hope you enjoy more than i did

thejerk

Posted by thejerk at 08:14 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

the jerk is back after a small hiatus with more action-packed adventures, this time out of the most populous muslim nation on earth. jihads were declared and fear of small korean-americans were exposed.

in the time i was offline, i've nominally retooled the site to adhere to the latest set of rules prescribed by the Kyoto Protocol II: the return of liberal European hysterics. that is, i've lessened your bandwidth requirements by converting my movies to Flash, allowing me to upload longer video masterpieces without hindering your downloads of the latest sexy-time movies. because the environment is worth it. did i say environment? i meant 'adult' entertainment.

enjoy vous plait,

Indonesia I: Bali & Lombok

Posted by thejerk at 08:36 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

for those of you who care¹, i've left the country again en route to an astounding 3 more years of international travel. 2003 - 2006 was great but after 3 years of continuous world-wide travel, i decided to take a break at home this summer with the plan of returning recharged in the fall. mission: accomplished. added bonus, i stole myself a digital SLR camera w/ 200mm pervert lens. prepare to be dazzled, you wretched sociopaths.

without further ado, i present the first set of pictures of 2006 as well as the first set of pictures from leg three of my planned 6 year jaunt around the world (and then into the poor-house):

Borneo-rific!

stay tuned to www.thejerk.org for stories sure to make you pull a muscle yawning.

tj

¹or for those of you who don't care or those of you who superficially care but in reality want me to die or for those of you who don't care and want me to die or for those of you who shoe-horn your gargantuan feet into a shoe 2 sizes too small for you

Posted by thejerk at 12:38 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

6 full months in the philippines. whew! i can sure use a brewed coffee and a good 3 month rest in the US&A.

i have to warn you, i'm a bit low on website bandwidth so some of you may face transfer outages. by some of you, i mean, probably all of you. on second thought, just go to a better website, altogether. may i suggest www.albino-midget-wrestling.mx (you know, it's a real sport down there).

highlights include:

- siargao island surfing
- cockfights, i.e. outside of a bar/disco setting
- more beaches obviously
- palawan island, what i've been searching for all along
- monkey friends (photos and video)
- chicken slaughtering (blood curdling)

philippines part 4

a land with such friendly people and great beaches should be just as popular as thailand. well, you heard it here first: the philippines is the new thailand.

but i reserve the right for one complaint about the philippines. as a result of spanish and american colonization, filipino names are incongruously paired with its asian population. i firmly believe that never, and i mean ever, should anyone meet a mongaloid named Rico, Manolo or Jesus. and that's final!

Posted by thejerk at 10:37 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

4 months in the philippines. my legs ache. traveling cumbersome. hair grows where hair should not be. not yet a perfect beach. require good thai food, massage, and a "release". send my widow a corsage.

pictures here, shnarf

highlights:

- some white-ish beaches (but less beaches than philippines part 2)
- diving w/ fishies (i.e. all scuba, no muff)
- africans (namibians, south africans, pinays) but not necessarily black
- the perm: a day that will forever live in infamy
- together at last: world's smallest primate & the world's hairiest
- the departure of shlomo and therefore my pictures become 100% less jewish and with 50% less back hair
- Camiguin's Lanzones festival w/ a cameo by the philippines' "pocket president", Gloria Arroyo

i am utterly lost and directionless in life and my forked tongue spews forth only venom. enjoy the pictures!

regards,
sir jerksalot (recently knighted)

Posted by thejerk at 08:51 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

i'm on the islands in the philippines in search of the perfect beach w/ reasonable prices and accomodations on or facing the beach. so far, i've found a few near hits but mostly high prices and old white men courting young filipinas.

these pictures won't be for everyone, beach enthusiasts mainly and those that desire my downfall and its accompanying schadenfreude. oh, and those that enjoy the harrassment of israelis named shlomo will enjoy these pictures too.

Continue reading "philippines pictures part swei (verdict: extremely beachy)" »

Posted by thejerk at 02:03 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

fresh from a fight to the death with a pair of knife-wielding filipino lolas, the jerk brings you some relatively uninspired pictures of the island of Luzon and its insane inhabitants. god bless 'em, because they try.

highlights include:

- UNESCO world heritage sites, including rice terraces that'll knock your socks off, if you're wearing any
- filthy black sand beaches
- monsoon rain, and how!
- native soft-core pornography (otherwise known as black and white pictures of indigenous folk)

so switch all other electronic devices off, buckle yourselves in, place your erections in the locked and upright position, because there are 166 joyous pictures celebrating filipino culture and my direct attempts to mock each one.

click here or to go straight to the porn, click here

note: large images may not work yet until pennis gets off his oversized pear-shaped arse and fixes his router.

Posted by thejerk at 01:14 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)